megaman2: megaman2: “mickey mouse it says you want to divorce minnie because she was…… extremely silly?” “no, i said she was fucking goofy” please stop reblogging this i stole this joke from my brother
Me when I eat an apple: I'm so fucking healthy.
50% of me wants to be the type of girl who does yoga at night, and drinks green tea, and reads books, and wears cute pyjamas, and stays at home; while the other 50% of me wants to wear my sexiest outfit and go out doing lines of cocaine off strippers racks while dancing to dirty music until I black out.
Every time I get my period: Wow no okay that was not a month.
spookymormon: please stop asking me about my future ill cry
projects at the end of the school year
i hate the feeling when you’re talking to someone you love and you feel nothing but annoying and dumb
jewishprick: i’m not saying we should have sex but we should
tellerknowles: does anybody else have that friend that you’re pretty sure is your soulmate but in a friend way